Tuesday, 15 January 2013

Strawberry Ice Cream

Happy Birthday! just in case it's your birthday when you read this.

Well! I'm back for a second day of mayhem and destruction... Don't blame me.. You can blame my good friend Emma, she encouraged me so it's entirely her fault. (If you're reading this love, tell your Nana to keep her back to the wall.)

So! Another day... i woke up feeling hungover as promised, slapped on some BeauSoleil and guzzled some Cherry Coke. The only thing  i know that is better than Sex first thing in the morning is Zydeco music.... i wouldn't mix the two though... the rhythm would be absolute comedy gold! In fact, ANYTHING with accordions in it is a no go area for Sex unless you both wanted to be sobbing with laughter and kill the mood. A past experience found me with a partner when suddenly, The Dreadnoughts came on... if you haven't heard them, they are a Folk Punk band that mainly do Sea Shanties with punk... what started as a passionate and gentle moment between two consenting adults ended in me feeling like a sweaty, bearded Sea Captain back in port, in the back room of a rough pub with a prostitute about 200-300 years ago.. 

While we're on the subject of sweaty bearded Sea Captains, i noticed Sharon Osbourne has been in the newspaper for being unreasonable....AGAIN. Now... i THINK it was about someone else's weight issue.. didn't she used to be a whole lot of woman herself? I remember looking for pictures a while ago of when she was huge but couldn't find any! Must be a global cover up, because if you buy the tribute album they made for Lynn Strait when he died, (Strait Up i think it was called) there's a picture of her in there looking massive.


AAAAAH! There we go! Ozzy and Sharon in 1987... and i think it got worse than that. Surely you'd think someone who was big in the past would have a little more understanding than to slam another person for their weight..... especially when she cheated and had hers hoovered out.

Anyway! This isn't a fuckin' celebrity gossip column so shall we crack on?

So today is National Strawberry Ice Cream day! to celebrate this day i have bought Vanilla Carte D'or Ice Cream to say "Fuck you" to the system... take THAT society. How are you guys celebrating yours? Did anybody actually know about this ridiculous holiday some Ice cream company probably paid Hallmark to invent so they could make a few bob? (To our Cousins overseas, that's a term used for making some money)

Seeing as it's quite early, i don't have much else to say... so i will either post later today, or tomorrow! Check back regularly to see if i've posted any more useless crap :)

Looooooooves <3 <3 

Zydeco Hooligan

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